Is It My Fault?
– Devanshi Rungta
Every day I walk to school,
In fun and frolic I move;
But these eyes they stare at me,
Is it my fault to be wearing a skirt till knee?
In the evening the parks were fun to go,
On the swings, we would go to and fro;
That uncle would come and give sweets,
Is it my fault that I am a kid who loves treats?
He touched my hand and pulled me close,
Which was uncomfortable but no one knows
Vacations were fun overdosed,
I would go to meet my aunt and uncle whom I love the most;
One day Uncle took me to a room,
Is it my fault that I couldn’t foresee the doom?
He touched me where I did not like,
He did it more inspite;
I screamed and screamed my lungs out,
Is it my fault that there was no one to hear me out?
I thrust him and ran away,
I told him that I will complain;
He stopped me and laughed astray,
Threatened me not a word to say
Everyone would think that I am crazy,
Because I am not a mature lady;
He told me that no one will believe,
It will be just another story I weaved
There will be problems in family because of me,
Everyone will fight, can’t you see?
I shut my mouth and I went to Mom,
Later, I cried and cried all night long
Is it my fault that I was not too strong?
The secret is still with me,
I don’t know when it will make me free;
I don’t know when the silence will break,
Was it really my mistake?
Is it my fault that I was about to be raped?
The above poem is the pain and abuse that a girl goes through. I have tried to pen down a journey that a sexual assault victim goes through. The smallest of things that happen to us every day in the form of abuse makes us uncomfortable and we never speak up. At that tender age we don’t even realize something bad is happening to us.
I talked to around 10 people. 4 were my relative and my elders. But it was quite difficult to speak to them about this issue as they are not comfortable talking about it. But the rest of the people were my peers and friends aged between 19-25 years old. Out of those six, three of them had been a victim of sexual abuse. It was shocking to see the number of people who have gone through sexual abuse in their childhood and did not really know how to deal with it and who to share it with.
The main problem that I found was children think that it is their fault that they were a victim of abuse. But we need to make them understand that it is not them but the person’s fault who committed such a heinous act.